“In every single thing you do, you are choosing a direction. Your life is a product of choices.”

— Dr. Kathleen Hall, CEO of the Stress Institute and Mindful Living Network

A recent high school graduate, Mateo was considering his options for the future. He knew he wanted to go to college, but he wasn’t quite sure what he would study. At a family picnic to celebrate his graduation, he talked about his indecision with his two uncles. One uncle, his Uncle Nico, told him that his best bet was to find out what types of jobs would be hiring in a couple years at a high enough salary for Mateo to afford to live however he desired. His other uncle, who rarely agreed with Uncle Nico, nodded and said, “Hey, that’s one way to look at it, but don’t you want to enjoy what you do every day regardless of how much money you make? You should do whatever interests you. After all, don’t they say that if you love what you do, you’ll never work a day in your life?”

Mateo appreciated the advice of his uncles and realized that they might both be right. He wanted to do something that interested him, but he also wanted to be employable and to make money. Clarifying his interests and recognizing his values would be key to helping Mateo decide his path.

Values

Values are the basic beliefs that guide our thinking and actions. Whether we are consciously aware of them or not, values influence both our attitudes and our actions. They help us determine what is important and what makes us happy. It is important to think about and reflect on your values, especially as you make decisions.

ACTIVITY: Determining Your Values

To begin to identify some of your personal values, consider the examples listed below. As a first step, select the five that you find most important, that bring you the greatest happiness, or that make you feel the most proud. Then, rank those five values in order of importance. Feel encouraged to write in other options that are relevant to you.

Table 2.1

Another way to recognize the important influence of values is to consider if you have ever made a decision that you later regretted. Did you reflect on your values prior to making that choice? Sometimes others ask us to do things that are inconsistent with our values. Knowing what you value and making plans accordingly is an important effort to help you stay on track toward your goals.